Ang Kaserola at Kung Bakit Dapat Magtimpi Ka

May mga pagkakataon tayo na nawawalan tayo ng self-control. We suddenly snap, and things get out of hand.

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Natatawa pa rin ako sa tuwing naaalala ko kung paano ko hinampas ng kaserola ang kapatid ko nang minsang napikon ako sa sobrang kakulitan niya. Pero sa halip na maging disciplinary moment ang nangyari, nauwi lang kami sa tawanan. Bukod kasi sa nayupi ang kaserola, ni hindi man lang niya ininda ang paghampas ko sa kanya (mas malaking tao sa akin ang kapatid ko). Mas lalo pa nang nagsimulang maging sarcastic ang kapatid ko dahil sa nangyari, for me to realize na nag-shift na pala ang senaryo – ako na ngayon ang haharap sa disciplinary moment sa nanay ko dahil sa kaserolang inagrabyado ko.

Kaserola

May mga pagkakataon tayo na nawawalan tayo ng self-control. We suddenly snap, and things get out of hand. Sometimes we justify that this is plainly normal. May kanya-kanya tayong saturation point, na kapag na-trigger ay bigla na lang tayong sasabog. Parang isang baso na kapag napuno ng tubig at umapaw bahala na kung ano ang mabasa.

City Walls

The Bible tells us that “a man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls” (Proverbs 25:28). During the Old Testament times, ang pangunahing depensa ng isang bayan ay ang matibay nitong pader. Kaya naman lagi itong may bantay sa bawat dako at palaging sine-secure. This is their chief means of defense.

“a man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls”

Kaya naman if there is a breach in the security and credibility of their city walls, their enemies can easily penetrate conquer whatever is inside, and the city is already compromised.

Likewise, ang tao daw na walang self-control ay parang bayan na walang pader. Napaka-vulnerable sa anumang atake. Masaling mo lang nang bahagya, madali nang bumabagsak. Kaunting udyok mo lang, madaling bumibigay. Marupok, ika nga.

Self-control is being able to say no when we should say no. It is the capacity to restrain one’s self against things that are prohibited, or in excess. Yung kaya mong rendahan ang sarili mo sa mga bagay na alam mong makakasira sayo.

Stitching these ideas into our personal context, how do we exercise self-control nga ba (or the lack thereof)?

On Eating, Drinking and Everything in Between

During these times where food parks sprout like wild mushrooms, sobrang tempting ang mag-try ng maraming mga delectable and instagrammable food *maya’t maya*. Lalo pa sa amin na literal na kapitbahay namin ang pinakamatutunog na food park in town. Unless you’re a professional food blogger or invited ka ni Kuya Tonipet sa PopTalk, without self-control, a person can easily give in to excessive #foodporn just to satiate his appetite. Eh kung afford ko naman, is it wrong? It’s a matter of conviction. But at the end of the day, it all boils down to the qualifying question: is my appetite getting out of control?

It is actually not an issue of the amount, but an issue of the heart. Are my desires getting out of control? Am I still in control of my desires or my desires are now controlling me?

Not just in case of eating and drinking, but also in the way we handle our finances. Where do we usually spend our hard-earned money? Weekly sa mga midnight mall sale? Sa mga unreasonable bike upgrades? Sa sugal? Sa bisyo? The list goes on. It is actually not an issue of the amount, but an issue of the heart. Are my desires getting out of control? Am I still in control of my desires or my desires are now controlling me?

Pikon-talo

Dun tayo sa mas relatable: our temper. How easy it is for others to drive us crazy? Yung tipong aasarin ka lang tungkol sa nunal mo, naghuhuramentado ka na? Yung tipong nagkulang lang ng sukli sayo yung jeepney driver, nagsusumigaw ka na? Yung sakaling natapakan ka lang ng kapatid mo at nadumihan ang sapatos mong bagong laba, nakikipag-away ka na? O kaya inalaska ka lang ng kaunti, nanghahampas ka na ng kaserola. Haha!

Siguro naman nag-mature na ako, at hindi na ako basta basta nanghahampas ng kaserola. Kahit paano natutunan ko na hindi dapat nasisira ang “wall” ng pagkatao ko ng simpleng mga pang-aasar lang o pangungulit. Hindi ako dapat madaling mapikon. Pero it is easier said than done. To be honest, while I am writing this piece medyo naiinis na ako sa mga nang-iistorbo sa akin habang nangsusulat. Pero again, note to self, hindi dapat nasisira ang “wall” ng pagkatao ko ng maliliit na bagay.

I feel sad for those na bigla na lang napapaaway dahil sa napakaliit na bagay. The daily news is filled with unfortunate stories of murder dahil lang sa saging, toothpick, cup noodles bulalo flavor o dahil nataasan lang ng kilay. We are surrounded with people with “broken walls” na any moment ay maaaring ma-compromise ang kanilang buong pagkatao.

Strengthen your Walls

A person is only as big as the thing that pisses him off. Anong nagpapapikon sayo? Anong sumisira ng mood mo? Or to state it better, hanggang saan ang capacity ng walls mo? Kaya ka bang pabagsakin ng basketball game, ng pustahan sa DoTA, o ng sukli mong dapat ay pang-estudyante?

Don’t discredit yourself by getting pissed off with trivial things. Bigyan mo ng mataas na pagpapahalaga ang sarili mo by increasing your capacity to understand people and circumstances.

Intensify your wall! Fortify your wall! Don’t discredit yourself by getting pissed off with trivial things. Bigyan mo ng mataas na pagpapahalaga ang sarili mo by increasing your capacity to understand people and circumstances. Taasan natin ang bakod, tibayan ang harang. Hindi tayo dapat nako-kontrol ng ating mga desires at lalong hindi dapat pinapabagsak ng ating mga kahinaan. At hindi tayo dapag agad-agad nanghahampas ng kaserola.

A Single’s Journey to Family & Finance Conference 2017

The whole idea of investing emanates from you being a good steward.

I love going to seminars about biblical stewardship and financial management. Partly because yun ang naging course ko noong college, pero mas compelling reason din siguro na kailangan ko ng matinding motivation para maging mas matipid, masinop at enterprising. Kaya nga when I learned about CCF’s Family and Finance Conference on Facebook, I immediately clicked “interested”, without even checking the registration details. 🙂

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Yet when I was notified na malapit na yung event, and I learned that it will cost me P850-1k/tix (P1.5k-2k couple’s rate), medyo napaisip ako. I wanted to give it a go kaso I have bills waiting for me. Kailangan ko ulit I-spell ang P.R.I.O.R.I.T.I.E.S. Sa huli, I decided to give it up (pero narealize ko rin na I really need to learn how to manage my resources para sa mga susunod, hindi na mahirap mag-decide. Haha!).

Eh mabait si Lord. I read from Joei and Me’s Facebook page that she’s giving away free tickets for the event. I messaged her, and she told me to wait until 3pm for the announcement of winners. Since I seldom win in any kind of raffle draws, medyo chill lang. Until I received a personal message from Ms. Joei telling me that I won a pair of tickets! Wooh! Thanks for hosting the giveaway Ms. Joei! God bless you more! 🙂

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So ang medyo inalala ko na lang after ay since couple ticket and napanalunan ko, saying naman ang blessing kung mag-isa lang ako. Syempre meron na ako on top of my mind na iimbitahan, hehe. Kaso, hindi siya available (aww, sad). Then I thought, maybe a college friend? Time to catch up and apply the Pray-Care-Share lesson namin sa church. Kaso I didn’t get any response. Then pag-uwi ko, I realized, bakit hindi si mama? Siya na lang ang ide-date ko! Besides, tamang-tama rin ang seminar na ito as the CFO ng aming munting pamilya. So, ayun na. 🙂

Learning from the gurus

Yung first session pa lang, medyo mahirap na i-swallow. We were asked to conduct a personal financial health check by identifying what we own and what we owe. As an accounting major, at dahil nasa financial management din ang trabaho ko, medyo familiar naman na ako kahit paano sa mga financial concepts being discussed, pero iba ang kabog kapag sarili mong pera ang inaanalyze mo. Pero mas mahirap lalo kung wala ka naman talagang iaanalyze. Haha!

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Then came budgeting. Ang saya! I was encouraged to set financial goal, both for short term, medium term and long term. Ang daling maglista ng mga financial goals natin sa buhay – this age, dapat may ganito na… this age dapat meron na ako nito… this year ganito na dapat…. But setting goals is just the beginning of achieving such goals. It doesn’t end there. Malayong lakbayin pa!

While Joy Mendoza is speaking, alongside her husband Edric Mendoza, about her husband being so in love with spreadsheets, I uttered a silly prayer: Lord, help me to love spreadsheets too. I can’t believe na my whole career revolves around using spreadsheets and yet hindi ganun katindi ang pagmamahal ko dito. Hahaha!IMG_1145

Makailang ulit din tinanong kung ilan ang single sa crowd. Madami rin, considering that the event is a Family and Finance seminar. Magandang pagkakataon to learn the value of finances in the context of the family. The fact that most of the speakers did their talk as couple is something that I really appreciate. #RelationshipGoals indeed.

Ptr. Joby Soriano shared that 2/3 of couples fail to talk about money matters before they say ‘I Do’. No wonder why finances remain as the most argued concern for couples. Contentment is key, he emphasized. We are mere stewards, God is the owner, controller and provider of all things.

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After all the talk, I am convinced that there is really no great divide between the secular and the spiritual. Sabi nga ni Mr. Randell Tiongon, “the whole idea of investing emanates from you being a good steward” and in Proverbs 13:22a, which Mr. Tiongson emphasized as well, “A good person leaves an inheritance for their children’s children”.

 

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Syempre, Mama and I discussed about what we’ve learned from the conference. Medyo inexplain ko yung ilang concepts na hindi niya masyadong naintindihan, but nevertheless I am glad that like me, she’s encouraged to be more enterprising, to save and on top of that to be a good steward of God’s entrusted resources.

On my part naman, mamahalin ko na si MS Excel.

Tsaka parang rewarding din sigurong maging RFP 🙂

 

Work unto the Lord

“Choose a job you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.”

Let me borrow Confucius’ line: “choose a job you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.”

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The wisdom in his statement is basically fueled by the word passion – a strong feeling of enthusiasm or excitement for something or about doing anything. When you have a compelling reason to make an action, most likely you’ll do it without anyone asking or forcing you.

You are somebody when you got a job that revolves around your passion. Take for example a photo enthusiast who gets paid for doing what he loves most – taking photos! Or a travel blogger who roams around the world and gets paid for just eating, taking pictures and enjoying his travels!

When a known gaming company announced a job opening for an in-game administrator, I secretly wished that I’d get the job. Who doesn’t want a job that pays you for just playing a game during your work hours?

The reality of life is that majority of people just drag themselves to work, or yet, doesn’t even have a job to attend to. It’s either we are unemployed or underemployed.

If they’ll ask me for an overtime, there’s no way I’ll refuse! Wala nang pulis, baranggay at hiraman ng nanay. Too bad, I am not qualified for the post. I can only wish enough.

The reality of life is that majority of people just drag themselves to work, or yet, doesn’t even have a job to attend to. It’s either we are unemployed or underemployed. Plus, take into consideration the inconsiderate traffic situation, or meager salary, or the ultra-high tax rate, or the incessant increase in cost of living. Will there still be any room for us to love the job that slowly sucks the joy in us?

Good thing, there is a better motivation for us to work hard. More than the salary or the work environment or the day to day exposure to the fresh air of EDSA.

“Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men.” – Colossians 3:23

In the workplace there will always be people whose role is to shoo us away from our ideal work environment. There will be situations that will make us wanna quit and go home instead.

Shift your focus from the negative to the blessings you are receiving from day to day. While your circumstances might not change, you definitely will.

There will always be reasons for us not to enjoy the job that we have. Yet we can always choose to enjoy the One who has given us our job. Shift your focus from the negative to the blessings you are receiving from day to day. While your circumstances might not change, you definitely will. Your boss may be a kind of person who doesn’t get easily impressed, take comfort that Your heavenly boss is always eager to commend you “well done!”.

You may not have the kind of job that you are always excited to attend to, much more you’ll love to have for the rest of your life, you can always choose to love the One who always attend to your needs and loves to have you for the rest of eternal life.

04/30 of Blogging challenge

How We Handle Money Impacts our Relationship with the Lord

“Am I trustworthy enough to be entrusted with “true riches”?

Whenever I assess my spending habit, I can always say that I am more of the impulsive, emotional spender. I tend to buy things on impulse, most of the time because of a “false need” – things I presume to be important but realizing after a few days that I can go with life without those.

There are also times when my purchases are prompted by emotions attached to it. I buy things because of silly reasons like “I don’t have the luxury to have this thing when I was a kid” or “having this (or paying for this) will make me feel more important to [insert person’s name here]”.

There are instances as well when I spend on things based on presumptions on the future – that in due time, they will be beneficial to me. Yet time flies and the things remain unused, much more untouched.

I have my own spending personality. Everyone has their own spending personality. But however we spend our God-given resources, How We Handle Money Impacts our Relationship with the Lord.

This is the premise of the first session of the Biblical Financial Study, a ten-part series that I am attending as of writing of this note.

“Therefore if you have not been faithful in the use of worldly wealth, who will entrust the true riches to you?”  Luke 16:11

A question came stirring my mind that night – am I trustworthy enough to be entrusted with “true riches”?

I have this question ringing in my head. I felt guilty. The guilt that does not condemn me, but gives me hope.

Embarking on a Journey to Financial Wisdom

“Give and give until it hurts… Give and give until it hurts no more”

The first time I saw the poster about Biblical Financial Study series, I know that I have to be there. I immediately inked my planner on March 10 for the orientation and grabbed few of my pals to hear for ourselves what the course has in store for us.

10897958_10204820128335470_4623554547665469440_nPrompted by my desire to be more financially wise and stable, and my innate curiosity to learn, my friends and I headed to Marikina Christian Fellowship Center. The orientation has not started yet when we arrived, and I don’t know why I am so expectant during that time, like a child waiting for his birthday presents.

As the program commenced, I looked around the place. I can easily count the number of participants – not more than 20. I guess the seminar topic isn’t really that much appealing to others, considering it is also being promoted on air thru DZAS. Or maybe, the marketing isn’t that much effective. But that is least of my concerns. I just couldn’t wait for the program specifics of the series of seminar I am committing myself into.<blockquote class=”alignright”>“When you give God your tithe, that doesn’t mean you have the complete authority over the remaining 90 percent. All 100 percent of what you have is God’s.”

The orientation highlights the testimonies of two previous students of BFS (who will also be small group facilitator in the actual sessions) and presentation of the course outline.

Some of the most remarkable things I have pondered on the testimonies that night are as follows:

“Give and give until it hurts… Give and give until it hurts no more”

“When you give God your tithe, that doesn’t mean you have the complete authority over the remaining 90 percent. All 100 percent of what you have is God’s.”

I then concluded to myself – this will really be life-changing and habit-forming!

Ptr. Mark Aranal, or more fondly called “Direk Mark” and the one to conduct the BFS, introduces the course outline which includes lesson on Debt, Honesty, Giving, Work, Investing and Spending, among others.

I am all the more excited for the following weeks to come.