Iwas-Rupok Tips

Kung secure ka sa position mo kay Lord, no need to be insecure sa mga friends mong pumapag-ibig na.

Advertisements

Ilang araw na pero halata pa rin ang eyebags mo. Ilang gabi ka rin kasing napuyat kachat yung taong akala mo may something din sayo. Ramdam na ramdam mo yung kilig, yung excitement, yung spark na kumiliti sa mga senses mo. Bilib na bilib ka pa nga sa witty punchlines niya na alam mo namang galing din sa mga memes. Sa maikling panahon na nagkakachat kayo, naplano mo na agad yung motif ng kasal niyo at pangalan ng mga magiging anak niyo. Kung hindi ka nga lang nakapagpigil, baka tinawag mo na siya sa endearment na pangarap mo kahit wala pang ligawan na nangyayari eh. Ganyan ka karupok, bes.

Di ka naman masisisi, pa-fall siya e. Pero sa susunod na may darating ulit at magpaparamdam, paano mo ba tutulungan ang sarili mo na maging mas matatag?

1. Don’t compare your story. Yes, may times talaga na mapapatanong ka na lang kung bakit sila meron na tapos ikaw wala pa. Pero sa mga panahong naghahanap ka ng sagot, convince yourself na iba ang story nila at iba rin ang sayo. Don’t fall into the comparison trap, you will only end up defeated. Hindi ka loser kung wala ka pang lovelife hanggang sa ngayon. Magiging loser ka lang kapag nagpadala ka sa idea na mas blessed sila kaysa sayo. Hindi mass production ang love stories na binibigay ni Lord kaya no need for comparisons. Pang best-selling novel ang story mo, hindi pang tabloid. Kung secure ka sa position mo kay Lord, no need to be insecure sa mga friends mong pumapag-ibig na.

2. Don’t rush your timeline. Baka kaya ka madaling ma-fall kasi ang dali mo ring madala sa matatamis niyang salita. Huwag mong masyadong madaliin ang proseso. Nag-wave lang sayo sa messenger, post ka agad ng “could this be love, Lord?” Honor God’s timing. Nire-ready ka pa ni Lord para maging responsible at mature bago ka pumasok sa relationship. Ganun din ang future partner mo. Relational maturity takes time. Think of yourself as “mangga” and not “munggo”. Ang munggo, overnight lang magbu-bloom agad, pero walang tibay at hindi nagtatagal. Ang mangga ay nadedevelop underneath, hindi nagmamadali. In its appointed time, magbu-bloom, magiging fruitful at matibay, tatagal sa mahabang panahon. Sa panahon ng mga munggong relationship, seek and be mangga.

3. Don’t settle for less. Aba, you are meant for greater things! Wag ka naman umasa sa bahala na. Not because everyone around you are in a relationship na ay papatulan mo na agad without ever thinking kung sino ang unang magparamdam, para lang hindi ka mapag-iwanan. People flaunt their good side and their achievements and all the positive things about them to impress others. You have to look beyond that. Kung hindi ka discerning, baka magsisi ka lang sa huli. Hindi pwede ang pwede na. Ikaw nga pumipili ng best angle mo para sa profile picture mo, ganun din dapat sa relationship. Seek, wait and pray for God’s best. Don’t hesitate to challenge his or her intentions. Dun lalabas ang totoong kulay niya. Di mo alam, baka pang-3 weeks relationship lang pala capacity niya. At least hindi mo pa siya naipakilala agad sa parents mo. Less hassle pa.

Huwag kang masyadong maniwala sa mga nababasa mo sa social media na kapag may jowa ka na, magiging kumpleto ka. You are already complete in the first place. Remember, people often flaunt in social media so you might end up believing a false reality na relationship is pure bliss. Mali yun. Relationships that are true, lasting and satisfying are those that honors God’s will and timing.

The Dream

Then a stirring came upon my heart. I need to protect the lady.

 

It was bit amusing yet chivalrous, bizarre yet encouraging, finding myself in a dream fighting to win someone’s heart. I know, it is imperative not to over-spiritualize things, especially dreams which are most of the time product of our ‘subconscious’ personality, but I believe my dream speaks of every man’s journey to search for his ‘better half’ and upon finding her, to serve and protect her with all his might. After all, God sometimes speaks through dreams. And while I do not claim any direct, divine explanation for my story, allow me to just sprinkle some thoughts I pondered as soon as consciousness hit me on my bed that day.

The Dream.png

The story unfolds inside a mansion with many rooms; contemporary in design yet the expanse so big it is comparable to an ancient castle. Some of the rooms are breathtaking in design and intricacies; some are so plain and dull. A fine, attractive lady is escorting me in my trip inside the mansion, bringing me from room to room boasting of its beauty. Her facial expression goes along with the design of the room – plain and mediocre when inside the plain rooms, radiant and spirited when inside the beautiful rooms.

As we progress in our journey that day, I noticed that the rooms are depreciating in splendor. The surrounding becomes damp and crowded; cobwebs begin to be visible and there emanates a stinking smell. Then I also noticed the embarrassment in her face. Our pace reduced and I can see the hesitancy in her eyes. It’s as if all the pain and doubts and worries and fears in life came upon her that moment. But I admired her for being strong. We moved slowly and she led me to the rooms with the worst condition compared to the first ones. She cries as she was telling me the stories behind the rooms. For some rooms, she can cite reasons, for others, she just returned blank stares, suggesting her lack of idea. I joined her in tears until we reached the terrace, which is also the end of my journey with her inside the mansion.

[I joined my friends outside the mansion. There we talked about our respective journeys in life. We poured out ourselves to each other as a band of brothers, ready to protect one another.] But when I gazed at the terrace, there I find visions of men and women contributing to the ugliness of the rooms I have witnessed inside the mansion. Some are even attempting to create new ugly rooms. Then a stirring came upon my heart. I need to protect the lady. I need to rescue her from people who try to add tears from her eyes by building ugly rooms in her mansion.

But we fought on the same battlefield. Our weapons seemed to be small and weak compared to our antagonists’, but we can retaliate. It is as if Someone stronger than anyone else in the field is backing us up.

With friends alongside, we fought the forces. We fought our different battles. They had their own motivations. Mine is to rescue the lady. But we fought on the same battlefield. Our weapons seemed to be small and weak compared to our antagonists’, but we can retaliate. It is as if Someone stronger than anyone else in the field is backing us up. Ultimately, we won. We ended up victorious. And a celebration awaits us.

I gazed again at the terrace. There she is, surrounded still by the horrors of the ugly rooms behind her. With her as well are the people who love her and care for her welfare. But now I can see her welcoming countenance. Without hesitation, I asked her to come down from the terrace. She turned around and bade farewell to the people behind her, as if asking for their approval, which they gave. And with just a glimpse, she joined me at the celebration below; with the happiest face I can ever imagine, ready to build beautiful rooms in our own mansion.